My Attempt at Ramadan

I only lasted 3 days for this Ramadan thing. Pitiful; I know. I thought that I could at least drink water between sun up and sun down, but you're not allowed to even do that. You can' t do anything whatsoever! By the second day, my mood had changed from spunky to bitch-o-rama. Of course I didn't want to subject anyone to my bitchiness due to lack of food & drink so I gave up by third day. I don't think I even want to guess how I would be by the 15th day. Perhaps next year, I will attempt it again. People think I'm weird for following an Islamic custom. Especially for not being Islamic. But how are we to begin to even understand people and their customs if we don't attempt to partake in some of them? Participation is key to unlocking true understanding. Reading up on the information in books isn't enough. I have no intention of following the Islamic tradition, but to grasp a little bit about their culture is broadening in itself.

I saw "Him" out at the bar and he thought I shot him a dirty look. Silly boy. Perhaps I did, but I didn't mean it that way. He was in the middle of talking/hugging someone and I thought it rude to interrupt him. (thought - Hmmm, I must have powerful looks...). I thought the best approach would be to just make eye contact to make myself known. Besides, he was there with his friends and I was there with mine. Poor fella, he was so drunk though; and a quiet drunk at that too. It's comforting to know that he doesn't cause drama, get rowdy or obnoxious when drunk. He does however get loverly-like which I found so darn adorable and irresistible. I was slightly buzzed but that's because I didn't want to drink, as I had to get up at 4:45 a.m. to be at work at 6:00 a.m. Note: I was actually awake until 2:30 a.m. Ouch is right!

Usually guys I have dated in the past had at least one or two big-deal mannerisms or habits that always made me have to contemplate if it was something I was willing to overlook or not. Usually the answer resulted in me no longer speaking to them and moving on. For the last guy, he didn't do very well by the third date. Perhaps everything is still new and I'm seeing Barbie-doll pink though my rose colored goggles, but it is indeed nice so far.

The only downfall to this new butterfly feeling is that I didn't realize that by seeing him, my game would be completely trashed. Every single one of my guy friends are not very happy with me right now. I don't know what they expect from me, really... One wanted to take me to Chicago on a trip coming up, the other was pissed off at the fact that I was allowing "Him" to excessively flirt with me, and then there was one whom I've known for many years and is also a friend of "Him" confessed his heart to me. Boys are always fickle. I don't like to concentrate on figuring them out. I have a hard enough time trying to figure myself out sometimes.

One thing has been on my mind since Saturday night. Since my old best friend and I broke off our friendship almost one year ago, the entire group of girls that we mutually hung out with took to her side and stopped speaking to me. This is fine, but at least be civil when you see me. Saturday night, I ran into one of the girls I used to hang out with. I at least expected a fake hello, but she just glared at me and walked right past me. She was no less than one foot in front me and she said nothing and walked away. I found her actions rude since I never did anything to hurt her. She was always one person I respected and adored because she was the most positive person out of the group. I think I'm spending way too much time thinking about this. People who are going to act aloof and cold to me do not need more emotion that I've already spent.

This week it's back to Yoga and Budokon. I haven't done it for at least a week and a half because I've been deep cleaning the darn house. So, as of tomorrow morning, I start again. Wish me luck with my sore muscles. ^_^